P5 fc"i o 

^er M. BAKER'S 
NEW PLAYS. 



NEVADA, or The liOSt Mine. S Acts. Price 25 cts. 

PAST KKDEMFTION. 4 Acts. Price 25 cts. 

COMRADES. 3 Acts. Price 25 cts. 

TITANIA. A Fairy Play for Children. 2 Acts. Price 25 cts. 

OUK FOI^KS. 3 Acts. Price 15 cts. 

REBECCA'S TRIUMPH. For female characters only. 

Other New Plays. [Price 25 cts. 

I SANTA CLAUS THE FIRST. A Christmas Play for Children By F. E. Chase. Price 25c. 
.« POISON. As played by the «< Hasty Pudding Club" of Harvard College. 




Copyright, 1876, by Gborge M. Baker. 



Just Published. — " The Popular Edition" ol Baker's Beading Club and Handy 
Speaker. Nob. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 and 13, 60 Selections in each. Price, 15 cts. each. 



Spencer's Universal Stage. 

A Collection of COMEDIES, DRAMAS, and FARCES, adapted to either Public or Private 
Performance. Containing a full description of all the 
necessary Stage Business. 



PRICE, 15 CENTS EACH. 



' No Plays Exchanged. 



1. LOST IN LONDON". A Drama in 3 Acts. 

6 male, 4 female eharaaters. 

2. NICHOLAS PLAM. A Comedy in 2 Acts. 

By J. B. Buckstone. 6 male, 3 female char. 

5. THE "WELSH GIF,L. A Comedy in 1 Act. 

By Mrs.' Pianche. 3 male, 2 female char. 
■i. JOHN ■WOPPS. A Farce in 1 Act By 
W. E. Suter. 4 male, 2 female char. 

6. THE TirBKISH BATH. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By Montague Williams and F. C. Bumand. 

6 male, 1 female char. 
e. THB TWO PUDDIPOOTS. A Farce in 1 

Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 
l OLD HONESTY. A Comic Drama in 2 

Acts. By J. M. Morton. 6 male- 2 female char. 
^. TWO GENTLEMEN IN A FIX. A 

Farce in 1 Act By W. E. Suter. 2 male char. 
9. SMASHIN&TON GOIT. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By T. J. Williams. 6 male, 3 ftemale char. 
10. TWO HEADS BETTER THAN ONE. A 

Farce in 1 Act. By Lenox Home. 4 male, 

1 female char. 
H. JOHN DOBBS. ''A Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. 

Morton. 5 male, 2 female char, 
12. THE DATTGHTEB, of the REGIMENT. 

A Drama in 2 Acts. By Edward Fitzball, 

6 male, 2 female char. 
A^. ATTNT CHARLOTTE'S MAID. A Farce in 1 

Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 
14 BROTHER BILL AND ME. A Farce in 

1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 4 male, 3 female char. 

16. DONE ON BOTH SIDES. A Farce in 1 

Aet By J. M. Morton. S male, 2 female char. 

■««. DUNDTTCKETTT'S PICNIC. A'Farce in 1 

Act. By T. J. Williams. 6 male, 3 female char. 

17. I'VE WRITTEN TO BROWNE. A Farce 
«, in 1 Act. By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 3 female 

char. 
10. MT PRECIOirS BETSY. A Farce in 1 

Act. By J. M. Morton. 4 male, 4 female char. 
SO. MY TURN NEXT. A Farce in 1 Act. By 

T. J. Williams. 4 male, 3 female char. 
a2. THE PHANTOM BREAKFAST. A Farce 

in 1 Act. tey Chas. Selby. 3 male, 2 female char. 

23. DANDELION'S DODGES. A Farce in 1 

Act By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 

24. A SLICE OP LUCK. A Farce m I Act By 

J. M. Morton. 4 male, 2 female char. 

25. ALWAYS INTENDED. A Comedy in 1 

Act By Horace Wigan. 3 male, 3 female char. 
26 A BULL IN A CHINA SHOP. A Comedy 
in 2 Acts. By Charles Matthews. 6 male, 4 
female char. f^ 



28. BOW^LED OUT. A Farce in 1 &.ct ByH. 

T. Craven. 4 male, 3 female char. 

29. COUSIN TOM. A Commedietta in 1 Act. By 

Geo. Egberts. 3 male, 2 female char. 

80. SARAH'S YOUNG MAN. A Farce in 1 
Act By W. E. Suter. 3 male, 3 female char. 

SI. HIT HIM, HE HAS NO FRIENDS. A 
Farce in 1 Act. By E. Yates and N. H. Har- 
rington. 7 male, 3 female ch^r. 

32. THE CHRISTENING. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By J. B. Buckstone. 6 male 6 female ohar. u 

33. A RACE FOR A WTDOW. A Farce in 1 

Act By T. J. Williams. 6 male, 4 female char. 

34. YOUR LIFE'S IN DANGER. A Farce in 

1 Act By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 

85. TRUE UNTO DEATH. A Drama in 2 Acts. 

gf, By J. Sheridan Knowles. 6 male, 2 female char. 



86. DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. An Interlude 



37. LOOK AFTER BROWN. A Farce in 1 Act 

By George A. Stuart, M. D. 6 male, 1 female 
char. 

38. MONSEIGNEUR. A Drama in 3 Acts. By 

Thomas Archer. 15 male, 3 female char. 

39. A VERY PLEASANT EVENING. A 

Farce in 1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 3 male char. 

40. BROTHER BEN. A Farce in 1 Act 'BfS, 

M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 

41. ONLY A CLOD. A Comic Drama in 1 £.et 

By J. P. Simpson. 4 male, 1 female char. 

42. GASPARDO THE GONDOLIER. A 

Drama in 3 Acts. By George Almar. 10 male, 
2 female char. 

43. SUNSHINE THROUGH THE CLOUDS. 

A Drama in 1 Act. By Slingsby Lawrence. 3 
male, 3 female char. 

44. DON'T JUDGE BY APPEARANCES. A 

Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 2 
female char. 

45. NURSE Y CHICKWEED. A Farce in 1 Act 

By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 

46. MARY MOO ; or. Which shall I Marry» 

A Farce in 1 Act. By W. £. Suter. 2 male, 1 
female char. 

47. EAST LYNNE. A Drama in 5 Acts. 8 male, 

7 female cha». 

48. THE HIDDEN HAND. A Drama in 6 Acts. 

By Kobert Jones. 16 male, 7 female char. 

49. SILVERSTONE'S WAGER. A Commedi- 

ettainlAct By R. R. Audrews. 4 male, 3 fe- 

^ male char. 

60. DORA. A Pastoral Drama in 3 Acts. By Chas. 
Reade. 6 male, 2 female char. 

65. THE WIFE'S SECRET. A Play in 5 Acts. 
By Geo. W. Lovell. 10 male, 2 female char. 

56. THE BABES IN THE WOOD. A Com- 
edy in 3 Acts, By Tom Taylor. 10 male. 3 fe- 
male char. 

67. PUTKINS ? Heir 1 3 Castles in the Air. 

A Comic Drama in i Act By W. R. Emerson. 

2 male, 2 female char. 

68. AN UGLY CUSTOMER. A Farce in 1 Act 

By Thomas J. Williams. 3 male, 2 female char. 

69. BLUE AND CHERRY. A Comedy in 1 Act 

3 male, 2 female char. /^ 



61. THE SCARLET LETTER. A Drama in S 

Acts. 8 male, 7 female char** 

62. WHICH WILL HAVE HEMP A Vaude- 

ville. 1 male, 2 female char. 

63. MADAM IS ABED. A Vaudeville in 1 Act 

2 male, 2 female char. 

64. THE ANONYMOUS KISS. A Vaudeville. 

2 male, 2 female char. 

65. THE CLEFT STICK. A Comedy in 3 Acts. 

5 male, 3 female char. 

66. A SOLDIER, A SAILOR, A TINKER. 

AND A TAILOR. A Farce in 1 Aci. 4 male, 
2 fbmale char. 

67. GIVE A DOG A BAD NAME. A Farce. 

2 male, 2 female char. 

68. DAMON AND PYTHIAS. A Farce. 8 

male, 4 female char. 

69. A HUSBAND TO ORDER. A Serio-comie 

Drama in 2 Acts. 6 male, 3 female char. 

70. PAYABLE ON DEMAND. A Domestic 

Drama in 2 Acts. 7 male, 1 female char. 



Descriptive Catalogue mailed free on application t» 

___ ^o» M. Baker & Uo., 47 Franklin St., Boston. 



MATCHMAKERS 



^ Cometig in ©ne ^ct 



By a. E. / 




BOSTON 
GEORGE M. BAKER AND COMPANY 






CHARACTERS. 

Mr. F. Harrington Courtenay, a banker. 
Mr. Aaron Fithworth, a young man with a hobby. 
Mrs. Evangeline Rodney, a designing widow. 
Miss Henrietta White, Mrs. Rodney's niece. 

PROPERTIES. 

Two chairs, a table, a screen, a newspaper, a mirror; two or three 
books, paper-knife, vase, chatelaine, inkstand, postage-stamps, on the 
table. 



Copyright, 1884, 
By GEORGE M. BAKER. 



All rights reserved. 



MATCHMAKERS. 



SCENE. 

Mr. CovrT'E^ ay discovered seated i?i an arm-chair, attempt- 
ing to read a newspaper. While speaking, he ibises, walks 
about impatiently, seats himself, and rises again^ 

Mr. C. It's no use! It's got to be done — confound it! 
It's the most infernal bundle of complications a man ever 
had to deal with ! See my way clear? A June-bug might * 
as well see his way clear through a paper of pins ! The 
more I try to straighten it out, the worse it gets. Attempt 
straightforward courses with a parcel of women? That's 
out of the question, of course. And when you've said a 
parcel of women, you've said a good deal ; but you haven't 
said it all, this time. There are parcels and parcels, — and 
this is a most particular parcel of most particular women ! 
Mrs. Evangeline Rodney — now, what can an ordinary man 
do with her ? But what do I want to do with her? Hanged 
if I know. There it is again ! I thought I knew that I 
wanted to marry her, when I came to stay at this con- 
founded place, knowing I should meet her; but between con- 
cealing my feelings here, and showing them there, I don't 
know which is my feelings. Now, I don't know whether 
that's grammar — is my feelings, are my feelings — I don't 
know any thing. If I stay here any longer, I shan't know 
how to spell. I'm gray already. Now, let us be reasonable. 
Mrs. Rodney will come in in a minute, and I must get my 
cue again. Proposition first: I wish to marry Mrs. Rodney. 
Yes, I certainly do: I do not think there is any reasonable 
doubt of that. Why don't I marry Mrs. Rodney ? Because 
Mrs. Rodney won't marry me. That is not exactly encour- 

3 



4 MATCHMAKERS. 

aging, but it is lucid. Why won't Mrs. Rodney marry me ? 
She may not after, but she certainly won't before, I ask her. 
Why haven't I asked her? Here arise the complications. 
Because, according to Marian Ramsay, who is responsible 
for our acquaintance, Mrs. Rodney cannot be induced to 
think of marriage for herself until her niece. Miss Henri- 
etta White, is settled in life, — shall have made a good match, 
in short. Just the last thing before I left her house, Marian 
Ramsay said, " If you fall in love with Evangeline, as I 
know you will, don't tell her so until after her niece is mar- 
ried, or at least engaged. She will not listen to you, and 
you will have ruined your cause." Well, I was not in love 
with her then, and did not pay very strict attention to the 
words. Things are changed now : war is declared, and my 
marching orders are important. " Do not tell her so until 
after her niece is engaged : it will ruin your cause." So 
far my course is plain. But my course cannot be limited 
to staying where I am for an indefinite period. Therefore, 
* Miss White must become engaged. Further complications : 
Miss White is a peculiar young lady. If she thinks other 
people want her to make a good match, she will make none, 
— or a very unfortunate one. If she thinks other people 
wish her to remain single, she will marry to-morrow, — con- 
found her perversity ! Now, what is the plain course for a 
plain man to pursue, that he may speedily realize Propo- 
sition I., — marry Mrs. Rodney? My hair is not only 
turning gray, it is falling out. Some simpletons would say 
it made matters easier to have a lover for Miss Henrietta 
right at hand, — my nephew Aaron. That shows they don't 
know her. If he was on the coast of Africa, and unable 
to get home, there would be some hope. Here comes 
Mrs. Rodney ! If I stay now, I shall certainly make a mess 
of it. I must have time to think it over. I shall prob- 
ably make a mess of it any way, but there's something in 
delaying even messes. Procrastination is the thief of time. 
{Exit L.) 

{Enter Mrs. Evangeline Rodney r.) 

Myls. ^. {coming down). He positively ran away ! Afraid, 

evidently. {Laughing) How absurd of him ! As if I could 

run away with him whether he would or no! Dear Marian 

was right: I have found him charming. But, if she had not 



MATCHMAKERS. 5 

added that provoking little postscript to her letter, I should 
not think any thing more about him. Here it is, way at the 
end. {Seating herself) " I'm so glad I had the pleasure 
of introducing Mr. Courtenay ! I know you will find him 
charming; and I know you will think his nephew just the 
man for the attractive, but perverse, Henrietta. It is very 
good of me to favor your matchmaking proclivities, for I 
don't approve of them at all." And yet she used to say she 
should make mine : Marian is changed in more ways than 
one. "/ would not dare make a match. Still, Mr. Fith- 
worth is an exceptional character. His connection with 
Mr. Courtenay will be invaluable to him business-wise, 
George says. As for Mr. Courtenay himself, I know, my 
dear Eve, you will try to flirt with him." Very unkind and 
unjust in Marian to say so ! Just as if I could think of such 
things. {Sijjhs, then brightens up, and goes on reading.) 
"But even in the country, with time hanging heavily on his 
hands, and even, even, Evangeline, \^\^ you near him, he will 
not fall in love. He is too afraid of losing his bachelor 
liberty. He -is not a woman-hater, he is worse : he is a 
woman-tolerator." So there is Mr. Courtenay's "character" 
for him, safe in my pocket. {Rises, and walks carelessly up 
io mirror, and glances in) It is a very provoking, and, yes, 
a very fascinating description. I wonder if I tried very 
hard — But there are other things that must be done first 
{enthusiastically). How little he knows into what dangerous 
places his Hues have fallen ! Afraid of losing his bachelor 
liberty, and walking straight into the toils of a designing 
widow ! I always used to think it would be nice to be a 
designing widow. Of course I don't mean that, for of 
course it is very, ve7y sad to be a widow; but the design- 
ing part. And designing young girls are not nice, so I 
should have to be a widow. {Sits, quite relieved) Now 
the sapper and miner are at work. Let me reconsider my 
plans. Henrietta really must be settled in life. To be sure, 
she is young yet, but she is such a responsibility ; and the 
longer it is put off, the harder she will be to influence. 
Then, afterwards I can think of — of other things. Now 
Mr. Aaron Fithworth seems to me to be just the man for 
her husband. Marian was right. Of course I do not wish 
to do any thing unwise, but this young man seems really 



6 MATCHMAKERS. 

designated by Providence. Mr. Courtenay says he was so 
much impressed by her when he met her last winter. He 
spoke of it quite in confidence, and seemed so pleased that I 
agreed with him that it might be a good arrangement if an 
engagement should result from this meeting. I must see 
him, and together we will develop our Httle plot. {Rises.) 
My part of the affair is none too simple a one, — to induce 
Henrietta to look upon him favorably. If she thinks I want 
her to marry him, she will not. If she thinks he wants her 
to marry him, ten to one she will not. This, then, is my 
problem : To make an ardent lover and approving relatives 
draw a young lady into matrimony while she thinks the lover 
indifferent and the guardians unwilling. It is really lovely 
to be so designing ! Why does not Mr. Courtenay conie ? I 
must be very distant, or he will suspect me of designs. 
{Enter Mr. Courtenay l.) 

Mr. C. Ah, madam ! I beg your pardon for any delay; 
but I was called away after coming here to meet you, some 
moments ago. 

Mrs. R. You are perfectly excusable, Mr. Courtenay. I 
wished to see you, you know, upon matters relating to my 
niece Henrietta. You tell me that your nephew is anxious 
to pay his addresses to my niece? 

Mr. C. Most anxious, madam. I expect him to plead his 
cause in person this afternoon. {Aside.) Faith, if he isn't 
too anxious, it will fare the better with him with Miss Hen- 
rietta ! 

Mrs. R. You conscientiously recommend him to me as a 
most desirable husband — 

Mr. C. {quickly). Indeed, madam, no ! There is another 
applicant — 

Mrs. R. For my niece's hand? 

Mr. C. No, no. You were speaking of your niece. 
Pardon me. {Aside.) Confound it ! I knew I should put 
my foot in it. She will have an inkling of my plans before 
it is time. 

Mrs. R. Yes, of my niece, certainly. {Aside.) Did he 
think I was about to appropriate his nephew myself? How 
suspicious he is ! But then I am designing. 

Mr. C. I wished to ask you if you would advise Aaron 
to adopt the — the measures usually affected by young men 
under similar — 



MATCHMAKERS. ♦ 7 

Mrs. R' Certainly not. 

Mr. C. Something a little different? 

Mrs. R. Something decidedly different. {LaugJiiitg) I 
see, my dear Mr. Courtenay, that you have fathomed my 
niece's character. 

Mr. C. Heaven forbid ! 

Mrs. R. That you have perceived her only too evident 
wilfulness, the perversity that lies at the root of her nature. 
Henrietta is an exceptional character, and must be treated 
exceptionally. 

Mr. C. {rises). Certainly. Couldn't we except her alto- 
gether, and pass on ? 

Mrs. R. Mr. Courtenay! 

Mr. C. Forgive me, Mrs. Rodney. I spoke most thought- 
lessly. The interests of my nephew are as dear to me as are 
those of your niece to you, and they seem to me to be iden- 
tified. What course would you suggest ? 

Mrs. R. In the first place, Henrietta must not at first 
imagine that your nephew is interested in her. From the 
moment she suspects that, all is lost. 

Mr. C. {walks r., a little bewildered). Certainly she must 
not, certainly not. That is evident at a glance. 

Mrs. R. Your nephew must be discreet, — must cloak his 
affection under a semblance of indifference. 

Mr. C. {aside). He'll find that only too easy, I'm afraid. 

Mrs. R. Then all will go well, I am sure. We must not 
forget to avoid all eulogy, indeed all expressed approval. Let 
us lead Henrietta to suppose that we are entirely uninterested. 

Mr. C. {aside). Lead Henrietta ! That is the hardest thing 
she has given me to do yet. I'd rather lead a soft-shelled 
crab! {Aloud,) I am at your service, madam. I shall do 
my best to observe your instructions, and will answer for 
my nephew. Afterwards {indifferently) might I ask, if this 
matter reaches a satisfactory conclusion — 

Mrs. R. {quickly). Oh, afterwards ! I shall stay in the 
country for a long, an indefinite period. I shall then have 
time and liberty for several cherished projects — 

Mr. C. {aside). She must not suspect any ulterior motive. 
Ah, indeed! Matrimony — 

Mrs. R. {quickly). Is the farthest possible subject from 
my thoughts, — except for Henrietta. {Aside.) That should 
put him off his guard. 



1 



8 ♦ MATCHMAKERS. 

Mr. C. So I hoped. {Aside.) Confound it! That's not 
what I meant to say ! 

Mrs. R. {aside). He need not have alluded to his fears 
so broadly. 

Mr. C. I mean that I imagined — naturally, Henrietta — 
after she was disposed of — I mean after her future was hap- 
pily secured-^— but we can't always tell about these things. 
{Aside.) Good heavens ! What an ass I am ! 

Mrs. R. No, but I hope all will be for the best. 

Mr. C. {fervently). So do I. There ! Some one has 
come ! It must be my nephew. I will go and interview him 
immediately. {Aside.) Any thing to get out of this. 

Mrs. R. Do so, and explain to him any apparent cool- 
ness on my part. {Exit Mr. C. l.) {Rises, conies down.) Oh 
dear, this is charming ! I can hardly keep all my designs in 
my head. Let me see. To make Henrietta think Mr. Fith- 
worth is not in love with her. To make her think I disap- 
prove his suit. To make him think that things are all right. 
To lead them into falling in love with each other. To lull 
Mr. Courtenay into a state of perfect security where he is 
concerned. 1 think I can do it all : now I must find Henri- 
etta. {Exit R.) 

(Mrs. R. re-enters with Henrietta. Henrietta has 
just returned from drivifig, wears hat and gloves, MRS. R. 
appears anxious, Henrietta impatient^ 

Mrs. R. But, my dear Henrietta — 

Henrietta. Please don't call me dear Henrietta! 

Mrs. R. But, my dear child — 

Henrietta. Please don't call me your dear child ! 

Mrs. R. Henrietta, you are impertinent. 

Henrietta. I beg your pardon. But, aunt Eve, how 
can I help it? 

Mrs. R. What have I done, Henrietta, that you should 
not be able to help it ? I am willing to make every allow- 
ance, but why the Suggestion that you should entertain a 
young man during the afternoon — 

Henrietta {walking up and dowrt). You know very 
well, aunt Eve, that you are dragging me up to a young man, 
and that's not so bad either, as the way your dragging him 
up to me; and you have — have — have — well, you've just 



MATCHMAKERS. 9 

Mrs. R. Pray don't, Henrietta ! I should think you were 
ponds ! And you make me shiver, thinking of drowning and 
such things. I am sure, in your soberer moments — 

Henrietta {sits l.). I shall jiever have any soberer mo- 
ments ! 

Mrs. R. You will wonder at your own impetuosity. The 
idea of my dragging a young man to you ! I have never 
thought of such a thing, — never. {Gently.) I have suffi- 
cient confidence in my niece's attractions, to feel that violent 
measures in that direction are as unnecessary as they are 
undesirable. This particular young man, moreover, is ab- 
sorbed in a hobby, — railroads, — which, according to his 
uncle, monopolizes most of his time ; and I should never 
dream of suggesting that you should interfere with his pur- 
suits. I should, indeed, be very sorry to have you trifle with 
him. 

Henrietta {a little softened). That is all very well. But 
you know, aunt Eve, that you, or that managing old Mr. 
Courtenay — 

Mrs. R. {offended^ rises). Henrietta, I cannot allow you to 
speak in this way of an esteemed friend. In point of fact, 
Mr. Courtenay is /^^/ an old man, and he is much younger, 
even, than his years. Also, while I do not understand pre- 
cisely your use of the word, I can confidently assert that he 
is not " managing." {Aside.) At least, not too managing, 
scarcely managing enough. 

Henrietta {i7npatient!y., rising). Well, then, this — es- 
teemed friend — has brought his nephew up into this part 
of the country to — to marry me. You know he has ! 

Mrs. R {starti7ig). To marry you, Henrietta ! What do 
you mean? Is there any thing very surprising in the fact 
that a gentleman like Mr. Courtenay should wish his nephew 
to visit the same house? A young man who, I will say, in 
spite of your absurd remarks, is a most estimable, intellect- 
ual and refined young man, and one whom any girl might 
be proud to marry, — any girl — 

Henrietta i pontiftg). I am not any girl — any girl, at all. 

Mrs. R. {sighing). I am conscious of your peculiarities ; 
and I do not say that this young man is at all fitted for you, 
— not at all. {Pauses impressively.) But is there any thing 
so phenomenal in the circumstances, that you should be led 
to fancy you are to be forced into matrimony ? 



10 MATCHMAKERS. 

Henrietta. Oh, no ! It would take a good many very 
phenomenal circumstances to force me into matrimony, — 
very phenomenal indeed ! 

Mrs. R. {sits r.). The circumstances may be most favor- 
able to love-making, I allow. A house in the country, two 
attractive, undeniably attractive, young people, and plenty of 
leisure : still {satirically), these circumstances are some- 
times unavoidable. 

Henrietta {rather i7npressed). But why do you want to 
send me to talk to him before I have been half an hour in 
the house ? 

Mrs. R. He has asked for you; and, my dear child, 
would it not be polite, not to say kind, to help to entertain a 
friend's guest, who has nothing to do '^. 

Henrietta. Why doesn't he go and talk to his uncle ? 
That is what he came up for, according to accounts. {Sits l.) 

Mrs. ^. {a little embarrassed). His uncle? Why — well 
{archly) — I want his uncle to talk to me, my dear. Don't 
blame your aunt for wishing to be entertained too. {Aside) 
There was diplomacy! 

Henrietta. I have never met him but once. I am 
naturally very shy. 

Mrs. R. {laughino). Go and take your hat off, and give 
your shyness time to wear off. Come back here, and renew 
your acquaintance. That is a dear child ! His uncle shall 
re-introduce you, if necessary. I will go, and let him know 
that you have arrived. {Exit L.) 

iiENRiETTA {j^iscs, comcs down). It seem to me that there 
is about this matter a good deal of — red-tape. Why doesn't 
aunt Evangeline leave the matter to accident? Why must 
she go and tell Mr. Courtenay that I am here, and find out 
if Mr. Fithworth is here, and tell Mr. Courtenay to tell him 
that I am here, and every thing? Mr. Courtenay does not 
seem to me one of those men who are positively dependent 
upon the presence of their younger relatives for mental 
support, but he doesn't seem able to live without Mr. Fith- 
worth another minute; yet, when this affectionate and cling- 
ing nephew reaches his equally affectionate and clinging 
uncle, he is turned over to me for entertainment. I must 
be polite, however, or aunt Eivangeline will scold me ; and 
it bores one so to be scolded! If I should be actively 



MATCHMAKERS. 1 1 

disagreeable, the young man might leave too ; and then, I 
suppose, Mr. Courtenay would waste away before our very 
eyes. That would be so sad, and family affection is so 
beautiful ! No, I will disarm suspicion, I will deceive 
them all. I will think he is perfectly splendid. I will be 
hopelessly smitten. He shall be all my fancy painted him. 
Then they will let me alone, and I can easily arrange matters 
with him. I hope he will not receive instructions to be too 
ardent. The last eligible young man was very tiresome. 
Meanwhile, I will go and prepare. Let him look to it! 
{Exit R.) 

{Enter Mr. Fithworth l., who walks neriwusly up and 
down the roo7n. Takes up, and lays down, things) 
Mr. F. Good gracious ! I don't see how I'm to get 
out of it. I must have the money : nobody has it but uncle 
Courtenay. I can't get it, unless he marries the widow ; 
can't marry the widow, unless I marry the niece ! Was 
there ever such a circle of perplexities drawn round a man ! 
{Pauses, and goes on meditatively.) Speaking of circles, I 
wonder if curving around that obstruction wouldn't be better 
than blowing it up. {Reconmiences his nervous walk.) But, 
good gracious! can't blow it up, unless I have the powder; 
can't have the powder, unless I have the money; can't have 
the money, except from uncle Harrington; can't — Oh, good 
gracious ! there I am again ! Suppose Miss White comes 
into the room before uncle Harrington : what should I do ? 
I haven't the least idea what to say to her. Uncle Harring- 
ton wrote that I was much impressed when I met her last 
winter. Daresay I was. Don't remember it now, — no 
time for such things. That railway niust be carried through 
to Mill's Station. There's lots of money in it, when it's 
once started. * Board of directors all chosen. {Rises, comes 
down.) What's that ? Thought I heard someone coming. 
If I only could make uncle Harrington interested in this 
railway, he wouldn't care so much about the widow; but 
he never did care any thing for railways. Well, tastes differ. • 
I never cared any thing for widows. Good gracious ! there 
is somebody. Oh, it's uncle ! 

{Enter Mr. Courtenay r., shakes hands with Aaron.) 
Mr. C. {with forced facetioicsness). So you have come. 
I thought you seemed pretty impatient. Considering your 



12 MATCHMAKERS. 

slight acquaintance with the young lady, you're a good deal 
interested. 

Mr. F. {absently). I am immensely. So are Brown and 
Davis to the extent of — 

Mr. C. Rivals, eh ? I hadn't heard of that. Well, you 
will have to despatch matters. Does Mrs. Rodney know 
any thing about this — Brown or Davis ? 

Aaron {walks r., weakly). No, sir, not — not unless 
you've told her. {Aside). I knew I should make some 
blunder. He knows I'm interested in railways. 

Mr. C. {walks l.). I shan't mention it. You'll see the 
young lady herself presently, and make the best of your 
time. 

Aaron. I will. But do you think that she is the kind 
of young lady that will take to me.-* {Perceptibly brighten- 
ing.) They don't sometimes. 

Mr. C. {walks r.). She will {impressively) if you take the 
right track. It's that I wished to see you about. 

Aaron {with conviction). I am sure I have, uncle Har- 
rington. 

Mr. C. {indulgently). And how does it lie ? What's your 
idea of it ? {Sits R.) 

Aaron {sits). It runs on the left-hand side, and goes by 
the old canal. That brings it up on the mound above, — 
quite a steep grade, but — 

Mr. C. {severely). You will find it a steeper grade than 
you have any idea of, young man, if you treat the matter in 
this fashion. What do you mean, with your impertinence 
about mounds and canals .'* 

Mr. F. {sadly, with his hand to his head). I only 
thought — 

Mr. C. Stop thinking then, by all means ! You may not 
find it very difficult. Now listen to me. Miss Henrietta 
White, though a most charming young lady, and precisely 
adapted to make you of all men happy, is a little perverse. 
So, if you act the ardent lover, she may give you your conge 
without further parley: therefore cultivate an indifferent 
manner — 

Aaron. Yes, certainly; nothing easier — to cultivate, I 
mean. 

Mr. C. {rises). However, never relax your efforts to be 



MATCHMAKERS. 1 3 

agreeable. Win her -^ her — well, her affections, and so 
attain your object. 

Aaron {warmly^ rises). Yes, and indeed I consider it 
an object worthy of every effort. Not only for the practical 
advantages resulting to myself personally, but it seems to me 
to be a scheme of philanthropy well suited to my nature — 

Mr. C. [aside). Well, I like that ! 

Aaron. The promised fare is within the reach of the 
poorest artisan, and the industrious mechanic — 

Mr. C. Hold hard! The promised fair /i-;^'/, I say! 
And you'd better not let her hear you say so, either ! I like 
your impudence ! 

Aaron. Impudence! 

Mr. C. {walks up and down). Yes, impudence ! She's 
not to be had for the asking by anybody, and poor artisans 
and industrious mechanics are not in her line. 

Aaron {bewildered^ but rousing himself at the last words). 
I beg your pardon, uncle ; I don't exactly understand you, but 
you're mistaken about the line. It runs directly through the 
smaller manufacturing towns — 

Mr. C. {thundering). And I tell you you're an idiot ! 
She never ran through a small manufacturing town in her 
life ! Her aunt wouldn't let her ! 

Aaron. Her aunt! {Aside) Oh, I see! I am an idiot. 

Mr. C. {still angry'). If, after you have married her, you 
let her make that sort of a spectacle of herself, I can't say 
any thing ; but she is at present in charge of a lady of sound 
common-sense, and, though she herself may be a httle flighty, 
she's not insane. 

Aaron {tneekly). I have the highest opinion possible of 
her and of her aunt, I assure you. I'll do my best to win 
her — her affections, as you suggested. {Aervously.) Will 
she be here soon ? 

Mr. C. She is driving, I think ; but her aunt expects her 
every minute. Have you seen Mrs. Rodney, Aaron? 

Aaron {absently). No, I haven't seen anybody. Is she 
as attractive as her niece ? 

Mr. C. Worth ten of her, Aaron. One is a mature, ac- 
complished woman of the world; the other, a sample of crude 
young womanhood. '{Quickly.) But an excellent wife for 
you, Aaron, excellent. By the way, how's that railway of 
yours coming on "i 



14 MATCHMAKERS. 

Aaron. Very nicely. A little money is all that is needed. 

Mr. C. {gayly). And that we will see about on my wed- 
ding-day. 

Aaron. You wouldn't be likely to forget it ? 

Mr. C. No, no, I won't forget it, Aaron. I shall be most 
uncommonly happy, I've no doubt, but I'll be a man of 
business to the last — to the last. On the day Mrs. Evange- 
line Rodney becomes my wife, you shall have what is neces- 
sary. 

Aaron. Without further conditions? 

Mr. C. {significantly). Without further conditions. {A 
short pause., Aaron plunged in thought. Mr. C. watches 
him^ then ?'ises, and says gayly :) 

Mr. C. When once that obstruction is removed, all things 
will go smoothly, no doubt. 

Aaron {looks up quickly., rises). Yes, sir ; and you know 
I wrote you about removing that obstruction. What do you 
advise 1 

Mr. C. {iynpatiently). I've been advising you this half- 
hour ! 

Aaron {meekly). I wondered whether you would suggest 
blowing up, or — 

Mr. C. Blowing up ! Good heavens ! You're the most 
previous fellow I ever saw in my life. For Heaven's sake, 
don't blow her up yet awhile ! I tell you she won't stand it. 
After the knot is tied, you can blow her up if you like — at 
your own expense ! {Exit L.) 

Aaron {sadly). I am afraid there is some mistake; in 
fact, I think I must have misunderstood my uncle. His 
terms are sometimes very ambiguous. Of course, if I had 
had any idea he was speaking about Miss White, I should 
not have spoken as I did. I am not at all hasty or unkind 
with women, uncle Harrington ought to know that. {Ab- 
se7itly.) I think if I could only give uncle Harrington a lively 
idea of my plan for the Moruckan, he would take more in- 
terest in it. I wonder if I couldn't arrange something to 
give him a kind of bird's-eye view. {Walks L. to a table be- 
hind a screen., up07t which are varioiis little or?ianients., sits, 
and says thoughtfully :) This book can represent the mound, 
this paper-knife the track, this vase will do for the depot on 
the east side, and this — this (a chatelaine), this can be the 



MATCHMAKERS. 1 5 

drawbridge. Now if — {Enter Henrietta r., Aaron does 
not see her.) 

Henrietta. They told me I should find him here. If 
there is any thing I cannot bear to do, it's to be sent to hold 
lip my head like a lady, and talk pretty to strangers. {Comes 
down) I know they expect him to make love to me. If he 
expects to himself, he may think better of it. I suppose he 
intends to dash into the business immediately, propose on 
the spot, overcome by the charm of my appearance and the 
multiplicity of my attractions ! Carry the castle by storm, 
in fact. We shall see. The nearer he approaches the torrid 
zone, the farther I shall withdraw into the polar regions. 
An iceberg will appear a sunny play-ground compared to my 
demeanor. He shall — 

Aaron. This is the stream over which the bridge goes, 
on which the wagons can travel that carry the rails and other 
material to build the road through the ravine which leads to 
the other side of the river — 

Henrietta {who has been drawing gradually nearer on 
tiptoe^ and now looks over the screen). And this is the cow 
with the crumpled horn that tossed the dog that worried the 
cat that killed the rat that ate the malt that lived in the house 
that Jack built ! 

Aaron. Cow f did you say ? 

Henrietta {coolly). I was ti"ying to assist you. Your 
intentions are undoubtedly good ; but your education has 
been neglected, and you did not say it right. 

Aaron {rises). My intentions '? Did you mean — 

Henrietta. I mean that I suppose that to be the house 
that Jack built. It's just about my idea of it. The 
crumpled horn is very good, but the cow is less conspicuous. 

Aaron {beivildere'd). I don't think I understand your 
allusions. I'm not conversant with that — literature. 

Henrietta. What z> it, then? 

Aaron. Which? 

Henrietta. All those. 

Aaron. Different things. 

Henrietta. Indeed ! 

Aaron. This, Miss White, is a depot on the Moruckan 
Railway. 

Henrietta {sits). Ah, is it ? 



1 6 MATCHMAKERS. 

Aaron (szys). Not a large one. 

Henrietta. So I should imagine. 

Aaron. A small one is all that will be needed at first. 

Henrietta. Where are the sponge-cake and pop-corn 
balls? 

Aaron. Pop-corn balls ? 

Henrietta. Why, you are certainly not so unwise as to 
dream of having a depot without a refreshment-room ! 

Aaron {siniling indulf^ently). That might be added later. 

Henrietta. Not at all. Better add the depot, or even 
the railway, later. {Moving things on table) Now, we will 
have this the sponge-cake with the fly-cover over it ; and this 
is the soda-fountain with the sign promising vanilla, wild 
cherry, coffee, raspberry, strawberry, and so forth, and 
where they never have any thing but lemon, and the cream 
all gone. 

Aaron {helplessly). Just as you like. 

Henrietta {sweetly). Oh, no, just as_y^« like ! Ginger, 
if you prefer, 

Aaron {timidly). Later it may be possible to make this 
place a centre — 

Henrietta. Is it desirable to make it a centre? 

Aaron {aigufttejitatively). Certainly. It seems to me 
that there can be no reasonable doubt that here is the most 
accessible point — 

Henrietta. It's just as easy to have it the centre now. 
Just put that inkstand on the right, and leave the paper- 
cutter where it is, and there you have it ! 

Aaron {pityingly). But, my dear young lady, that inkstand 
is a precipitous promontory. 

Henrietta. Oh ! {Aside.) I wonder if he is quite right 
in his mind. 

Aaron. And the paper-cutter cannot go through — 

Henrietta. I thought that was what they were for, but 
it's no matter. 

Aaron. On account of this obstruction : so you see that 
is impossible. 

Henrietta. Oh, certainly. Any child could see that. 
{Aside.) It's best to humor him, I suppose. {Rises, comes 
down) He does not seem inclined to be oppressively ardent ; 
and icebergs must be ordinary objects on his horizon, to 



MATCHMAKERS. 1/ 

judge from the indifference with which he regards them. I 
am not sure that any caution on my part is necessary. I think 
1 will try another tack. I suppose they would have told me 
if he had been really dangerous. {Goes back, amiably.) I 
don't think, Mr. Fithworth, that we quite understand each 
other. I thought it was some kind of a game, but it seems it 
isn't. Perhaps, if you won't think me too stupid, you will ex- 
plain this to me. 

Aaron {warmly). I am sure you won't be stupid. {Recol- 
lecting himself.) But perhaps — : uncle — or — perhaps we'd 
better talk about — other things. But I'm sure / should — 
I mean we both would — or, at least, you would — enjoy this 
mbre. 

Henrietta. I know nothing else we should enjoy so 
much. What is this postage stamp.-* Am^l where did you 
get my chatelaine 1 

Aaron. It was lying here, and I used it for the draw- 
bridge. That postage-stamp is nothing but a flag-station. 

Henrietta. Is that all 1 But I think a flag-station would 
be much prettier here, don't you ? It ought to be elevated, 
you know ; and we can put it up on this book. Then the flag 
can wave so much more effectively o'er the land of the free. 

Aaron {perplexed). But there isn't any elevation there. 

Henrietta. Oh, never you mind ! We can have one just 
as easily as not. It would hardly be any trouble at all, and 
so much nicer for the postage-stamp — I mean the flag-station. 

Aaron {gently). It would be nicer, but it hardly seems to 
me practicable. All we really need is a switch — 

Henrietta. A switch ! Oh, I couldn't really. You can 
use my chatelaine as long as you like, but I couldn't take my 
hair down now. {Aside.) Good gracious! What will the 
man want next ! 

Aaron. For the present, I mean. Later, I hope for a 
double track all the way. 

Henrietta. Let's have a double track now. Put the 
book so. 

Aaron. Ah, Miss White ! you have hit upon my greatest 
difificult}^ That bridge can be built only in that spot, which • 
forces us to make a detour 2it great inconvenience and {sadly) 
great expense. 

Henrietta. Haven't you money enough to carry it on ? 
If twenty-five cents would be any object — 



l8 MATCHMAKERS. 

Aaron {disregarding her lightness). I could have if uncle 
Harrington would let me draw on him. 

Henrietta. And will be not.'* And you and he so de- 
voted to each other ! 

Aaron {rises). That is it. He knows he can call on me 
for any thing. 

Henrietta. It is a poor rule that won't work both ways. 

Aaron. This does work both ways, but my share of the 
work happens to be the hardest. He says he will give me 
the money when he {frightened) — when he — can. 

Henrietta {laughi^ig). When can he? 

Aaron. When he marries. {Comes l.) You've no idea 
how much I admire you. {Aside.) I may as well begin. • 

Henrietta {rises., goes r.). Thanks, so much. When he 
marries ? Is he going to be married .? 

Aaron. I — I ought not to have told you. I'd rather not 
speak of it again. Not that that''s so much matter; but 
there is something else, — a contingency. (^A pause.) Do 
you think it looks hke rain 1 

Henriettta. I really hadn't thought. This contingency 
— what is it? You must tell me now. 

Aaron {aside). Why not, and have it over with ? {Comes 
towards her.) My uncle wishes to marry your aunt ! 

Henrietta. Oh ! is that all ? I guessed as much. 

Aaron. Did you ? Then, perhaps you have guessed the 
rest. But no, I don't believe you would. If you have, per- 
haps you'd rather I wouldn't say any more about it. If you 
had, don't mind telling me so. I won't: indeed, I'd as lief 
not. 

Henrietta {aside). I shall now unravel the plot. {Aloud.) 
What do you mean by the rest? That my aunt won't marry 
him? 

Aaron {mysteriously). He hasn't asked her. 

Henrietta. Well. {A pause.) Does he want her to ask 
him? 

Aaron. No. {Another pause; boldly^ He wants me to 
ask you. 

Henrietta. You to ask me! For what? My permission? 
{Laughing.) He shall have it. Shall I say the somewhat 
hackneyed, but always appropriate, " Bless you, my chil- 
dren" ? or does he prefer another form of congratulation? 

Aaron. That is not what I was to ask you. 



MATCHMAKERS. I9 

Henrietta. No? {A pause.) Whatever it is, you seem 
in no haste to get it off your mind. 

Aaron. That is just it. He told me not to be in a hurry. 
I'd spoil every thing. {Despairingly.) But I'll probably spoil 
every thing anyway ! 

Henrietta. Very likely. 

Aaron (slowly). He wants me to ask you to marry me. 

H'E^Ki-ETTA {a pause). Oh! {Another pause.) Why.? 

Aaron (eagerly). Because he thinks your aunt will not 
marry him unless you marry somebody first, and so he didn't 
want to say any thing to her until — I'd said something to you. 

Henrietta (aside). And Mr. Courtenay is not too man- 
aging! Aunt Evangeline was right, he is not managing 
enough. (Aloiid.) You've said something now ! 

Aaron. Then, there is the railroad. 

Henrietta (goes to table). Yes, there is the railroad. It's 
very ingenious. Did Mr. Courtenay tell you to shov/ that to 
me too .f* 

Aaron. No : that was my idea. 

Henrietta. And a very pretty idea too. So your uncle 
wished to bribe you into asking me to marry you ? 

Aaron. Oh, no ! not that. I wanted to — marry you — 
anyway. 

Henrietta. You appear to. (Carelessly picks up soitie- 
thing from the table) How long have you been animated by 
this absorbing desire? 

Aaron (looking at table). Ever since last spring, when 
the ground was first laid out. 

Henrietta (goes r., aside). It would be a comfort to 
know whether he is speaking of a cottage home or a lot in a 
neighboring cemetery. He jumps at conclusions so rapidly 
that he may lose sight of the intermediate step in either case. 

Aaron. I am sure I cannot fail, though it seems at first 
a rash undertaking; and, in the eyes of certain prejudiced 
people, success is scarcely desirable. 

Henrietta. It is very good of you to call them preju- 
diced ! 

Aaron. Oh, well ! there was a time when I saw the mat- 
ter in the same light myself. 

Henrietta (growing angry). Indeed ! How long ago, 
may I ask ? 



20 MATCHMAKERS. 

Aaron. Before the undeniable advantages of the step 
were proved to me. It simplifies matters, however, to have 
yoit consider it favorably at once. 

Henrietta. ' " Some prejudiced people " might think so, 
it is true ; but you do not seem much in need of encourage- 
ment. Have you decided upon the day which is to bring 
the grande finale of this ingenious plan, and definitely settle 
this matter in the presence of witnesses .'* As it is only a 
matter of time, I may as well, I suppose, be informed. 

Aaron {surprised at her tone). Certainly. Of course, I 
alone cannot fix it positively; others are to be consulted. 

Henrietta. Indeed ! you are very considerate. 

Aaron. But sometime during the coming sum.mer would, 
I think, be agreeable to all parties. We can have a band — 

Henrietta. A band? 

Aaron. And extensive decorations. 

Henrietta. In the way of flowers, I suppose. 

Aaron. Yes, and flags. 

Henrietta. The American flag? 

Aaron. Certainly, the American flag. 

Henrietta. I know that generally plays an important 
part on would-be-festive occasions, but it seems to me that 
flowers are more suitable for a church. 

Aaron. A church ! There will hardly be any necessity 
for a religious ceremony, I think. 

Henrietta. What ! 

Aaron. Why no, I think not. 

Henrietta. Mr. Fithworth, I have borne with this im- 
pertinence long enough. It rather amused, even while it 
vexed me ; but when you propose that we should be married 
before a — secretary., or — or a speaker {half-crying)^ or some 
other dreadful Y>^rso)i — I will not bear it; and I would like 
to know if you or your uncle think my aunt would permit 
such an arrangement. {Walks up and do7VJt.) 

Aaron {utterly bewilder-ed). I was not speaking of our 
being — being married. 

Henrietta. What were you speaking of ? 

Aaron. Of the completion of the Moruckan Railway. 

Henrietta {sits., hysteiically). Why didn't you say so 
before ? 

Aaron. I thought you knew. 



MATCHMAKERS.^ 21 

Henrietta. That mistake is rarely made. Please not 
make it again. 

Aaron. No, I won't. 

Henrietta. I will tell you what we can do. You pre- 
tend to have fallen in love with me. 

Aaron {eagerly). Yes, I have been pretending all along. 
{Sits.) 

Henrietta {tartly). You have pretended pretty badly, 
then. See if you can't do better. 

Aaron {meekly). Very well. 

Henrietta. I shall pretend to have fallen in love with 
you. 

Aaron. Do you suppose you can ? 

Henrietta. Oh, yes, I can / Thus we will cheat aunt 
Evangeline and uncle Courtenay into an engagement. See? 
Then you will have the money, and I shall be left free to do 
as I please. And then we can stop pretending. 

Aaron {delightedly). That is just the thing. 

Henrietta. Such larks ! Here they are now. Come, 
we must have a little time to rehearse. {Exetmt R.) 
{Enter Mrs. R. and Mr. C. l.) 

Mr. C. TheyJiave been here some time, and have just 
left the room together. I think the arrangement works to a 
charm, Mrs. Rodney. 

Mrs. R. (j-z/j- r.). Yes: my plan of letting them make 
each other's acquaintance was, I am sure, the better one. 
Henrietta is so ridiculously perverse, that the very fact of 
my presenting a gentleman to her prejudices him in her 
eyes. 

Mr. C. {draws a chair R.). May I hope that now that 
your uneasiness as to your niece's future seems in a fair 
way to be removed, you may turn your attention to the 
affairs of others, — affairs so immediately connected with 
yours that they are almost — in fact, that they become — 
your own affairs. 

Mrs. R. {laughing). My dear Mr. Courtenay, what a 
dreadfully long sentence, and how dreadfully often you 
introduce my affairs ! Are they in such a bad state ? Posi- 
tively, you frighten me. I know I have no end of plots and 
counterplots on hand, but I did not know I had fatally in- 
volved the interests of others. I begin to feel like a bank 



22 MATCHMAKERS. 

cashier, or a telegraph-office, or some of those complicated 
things. 

Mr. C. {drawing nearer). My dear Mrs. Rodney, you 
may have most unconsciously, most innocently, involved the 
interests of others to an extent that may well be termed 
fatal. 

Mrs. R. You are laughing at me, Mr. Courtenay. 

Mr. C. I am not speaking at random, believe me. I 
know of one who but waits for a word of encouragement. 

Mrs. R. {aside). He introduces a third person just as a 
tete-a-tete is becoming interesting. He is so afraid my 
designs include him, {Aloud^ But how can I look for 
this mysterious — I fear, fictitious — personage, while my 
dear Henrietta is still on my mind and heart.'' You know, 
Mr. Courtenay, she is my sole interest at present. 

Mr. C. {aside). I feared I was premature. Marian was 
right : " She will not have you, and you will have ruined your 
cause." {Gallantly}) Le't us hope then, that, in transferring 
her to the mind and heart of another, you may find a vacancy 
in your own, which some fortunate man may be permitted to 
fill. {Aside.) That was well shifted to general grounds. 
{Aloud.) If you will permit me, I will seek your niece, and 
may perhaps be fortunate enough, if not to win her confi- 
dence, to form some estimate of her state of mind. {Exit.) 

Mrs. R. {comes down). Charming man, but so afraid of 
losing his bachelor liberty ! Never mind : if Henrietta and 
Mr. Fithworth only fancy one another, there will be plenty 
of time for — But here is Mr. Fithworth alone. Mr. Courte- 
nay has probably taken off Henrietta. He little knows whf^t 
he does in trusting himself to the companionship of a design- 
ing widow. 

{Enter Mr. F., detet'initied to acquit himself creditably.) 

Mrs. R. How do you do, Mr. Fithworth ? I am glad to 
see you again. 

Mr. F. How do you do, Mrs. Rodney? 

Mrs. R. So you have finished your stroll in my garden ? 
What do you think of my roses ? 

Aaron. I think, that, beautiful as they are, they are but 
next the rose ! {Aside.) That was not a happy thought, 
it was an inspiration ! 

Mrs. R. Next the rose ! Why, Mr. Fithworth, you are 
a poet. Have you found, so soon, the rose par excellence ? 



MATCHMAKERS. 23 

Aaron. I have, Mrs. Rodney. Though perhaps often 
too much absorbed in the interests which must necessarily 
form so large a part of my life, I am not blind. Is there — 
think you? — any chance, any hope, — think you? — (a little 
confused) that your niece will deign to be the day-star — 
the head-light, as it were — of my otherwise dark existence? 
{Fans hi 7ns elf.) 

Mrs. R. {aside). What a singular j^oung man ! Evidently 
quite in earnest, but what an odd comparison ! {Aloud.) Ah! 
Mr. Fithworth, you are by no means the first that has found 
my niece's charms powerful. I am used to this story, but 
whether or not she will listen to it is another thing. Have 
you said any thing to her {impressively) — of the subject 
of subjects, I mean, of course ? 

Aakon (his 7nanner changes). Yes; and she seemed quite 
interested, — indeed she did. She thought of it quite favora- 
bly ; spoke of its being quite a nice plan. I told her that of 
course I could not promise that it would be all she hoped: 
the expense, of course, is the great question. 

Mrs. ^. {surprised., but listening politely). {Aside) What 
a very singular young man ! To speak of the expense as 
the "great question " thus early in the affair. And how very 
remarkable that Henrietta should treat the matter so! 
Spoke of it favorably ! {Smiling) The expense is a matter 
to be considered. It is often heavy. 

Aaron. Often simply ruinous. 

Mrs. 'R. {still s?niling). But I think you will manage to 
make both ends meet. 

Aaron. Both ends meet ! I had no idea of doing that, 
you know. 

Mrs. R. {helplessly). No, I did not know. 

Aaron. One terminus is at the extreme eastern part of 
the State, the other at the extreme western. 

Mrs. R. Terminus ! 

Aaron {mildly). You were speaking of the Moruckan 
Railway, were you not ? 

Mrs. R. {laughing). Oh, you man of one idea! How 
you mystified me ! I thought you were speaking of my niece, 
and your affection for her. 

Aaron {crestfallen). So I was, at first. I — I — am very 
fond of her. 



24 MATCHMAKERS. 

Mrs. R. [laughing). Be careful how you tell her of it. 
She might not be as indulgent of your hobby as you see I 
am, if you introduce it so inopportunely. 

Aaron. I have spoken to her of — of — it; and she — 
well, she listened. 

Mrs. R. {warmly). And that is as much as you could 
hope for, considering my niece's somewhat peculiar charac- 
ter {sighing). She seldom listens to me. 

Aaron. Then, you advise me to persevere } 

Mrs. R. By all means. And your uncle — he will ap- 
prove ? 

Aaron. Oh, yes! If he did not, I would give it — it 
would be unfortunate. 

Mrs. R. It would, indeed. But we will gain his consent. 
I am glad you admire Henrietta. I know you are longing to 
break forth into more poetic rhapsodies. 

Aaron. I — am. 

{A silence^ in wJiich Mr. Y. feels it his duty to rhapsodize., 
and Mrs. R. watches him with an expectant S7nile.) 

Aaron. She is — a very pleasant young lady. 

Mrs. R. Yes, charming manners. {Aside.) When she 
likes. 

Aaron. Yes. 

Mrs. R. {after a pause). And pretty. 

Aaron. Yes. Quite — quite pretty. 

Mrs. R. {after another pause^ a little ijnpatiently). And 
clever. 

Aaron. Is she? Yes, I noticed it. Very clever. 

Mrs. R. {rising). I see you do not intend to allow your- 
self to be too enthusiastic in my presence. {Aside.) I never 
saw so impassioned a lover ! A " very pleasant young lady," 
and "quite pretty"! What can Henrietta be thinking of.'* 
I am half repenting, but perhaps he is diffident. {Aloitd.) 
Where did you leave my niece .'' 

Aaron. I left her, about five minutes ago, in the garden 
with my uncle. 

Mrs. R. {impatiently). Five minutes ! Half an hour, at 
least. 

Aaron. Was it? {Recollecting himself^ It seems longer. 

Mrs. R. {half latcghing). Does it? It seemed shorter a 
moment ago. Suppose we look for them. 



MATCHMAKERS. 2$ 

Aaron. As you please. 

Mrs. R. {shaking her head). It ought to be 2,% you please. 
{Exeunt.) 

{Enter by another door Henrietta andMK. C.) 

Mr. C I am so glad, so very glad, my dear Miss Hen- 
rietta, to hear you say so ; and I should not speak so earnest- 
ly did I not feel your future happiness would be secured. 

Henrietta. You're so kind, Mr. Courtenay, so kind and 
disinterested. 

Mr. C. Not so disinterested as you think. 

Henrietta {innocently). No .^ 

Mr. C. Do you think, aside from my interest in you, my 
dear young lady, that it can be a matter of indifference to 
my family feeling, who is introduced to me as my future 
niece? 

Henrietta. Did you really give any thought to that.'' 
I shall now begin to keep watch over you, my dear uncle. 
You must be very careful whom you introduce to me as my 
future aunt. I'm so particular about such things, you've no 
idea ! 

Mr. C. So, miss, you already regard me as an uncle ? 
That's right. But I really didn't think Aaron, good boy as 
he is, would insinuate himself so soon into your interest. 
How was it, eh ? 

Henrietta {bashfully). Oh J he — well, you know, he's 
so — taking. 

Mr. C. Taking, is he? 

Henrietta {tnore bashfully). And so — ardent. 

Mr. C. {aside). He must have braced up wonderfully ! 
{Aloud.) Of course he is, of course he is. What else could 
you expect? 

Henrietta. And so wrapt up in me, so oblivious of 
every thing else. 

Mr. C. {aside). He was wrapt up in something else when 
I saw him. It is the real thing if it has knocked that deuced 
railroad out of his head. {Alozid.) I knew it would be so. 
{Facetiously.) There will be no doing any thing sensible 
with him now, I suppose. 

Henrietta (^j'/rtfe). No, nor at any other time. {Alotid.) 
He is so different from other people, so — what you clever 
people, who think in Latin, call sui generis. 



26 MATCHMAKERS. 

Mr. C. Sui generis, that is it. Trust a woman for keen 
analysis of character. 

Henrietta {detnurely). Some people might call it — 
queer. 

Mr. C. {easily). Some people might, to be sure. Queer? 
Yes, perhaps, queer — a little. 

Henrietta {quickly). But what is the odds as long as 
you are happy ? 

Mr. C. {laughing). What's the odds, indeed? He is — 
ahem — he has been {watching the effect) rather interested in 

— railroads. 

Henrietta {innocently). Has he ? I am so glad. Rail- 
roads are so nice. Perhaps he'll give me one of my own. 
I always wanted to keep a ticket-office. 

Mr. C. I have no doubt that he will let you. {Aside.) 
It's a special dispensation that he hasn't already offered her 
the situation ! {Aloud) Then, he hasn't yet introduced the 
subject ? 

Henrietta. No : it needed no introduction. It came of 
itself. 

^v.. Q. {puszled). Oh! 

Henrietta {sweetly). One subject is as good as another 
when you are in love, you know. 

Mr. C. {s7mling). Is it, indeed? {Aside.) I will never 
try to be apropos again. I will talk to Mrs. Rodney about 
the Maine election or the measles, just as it happens. 

Henrietta, I think I ought to speak to my aunt about 

— this matter. 

Mr. C. Pray, let me bring her to you. I should like an 
opportunity to say a good word for my nephew. 

Henrietta. You are very kind, but I'm sure he can't 
need it. He can make his own way anywhere. 

Mr. C. Aha, my young lady ! already judging others by 
yourself. Well, well, I imagine there won't be many diffi- 
culties in the way. {Exit, with a bowj Henrietta cour- 
tesies) 

Henrietta {sinking, laughing, into the nearest chair). 
Difficulties! Oh, dear! oh, dear! I never dreamed it would 
succeed so well. I wonder what that monomaniac has been 
saying to my aunt. I wonder how he rid the way of difficul- 
ties. Put on a cow-catcher probably, and cleared the track ! 



MATCHMAKERS. 2/ 

Oh, dear ! Wori'f there be a row when every thing comes 
out ? Let them try again to marry me off to an unwilling 
victim! I positively must waylay the railroad fiend, my 
future husband, — oh, dear! 1 wish I could stop, — and 
coach him for the grande finale. {Exit^ laughing.) 
{Enter Mrs. R. and Mr. C.) 

Mrs. R. So it really seems to be settled ? Henrietta is 
satisfied, and wished to inform me. I wonder that she is 
not here. Embarrassed, perhaps : I must go to her. 

Mr. C. Wait one moment, Mrs. Rodney. Now that this 
matter is, as you say, as good as settled, I must insist upon 
a hearing. You must let me speak of myself. 

Mrs. R. As if any subject could be more interesting to 
me, to any of your friends. {Sits.) I may caU you my 
friend.'' 

Mr. C. Not if I can help it, madam, 

Mrs. R. How unkind, Mr. Courtenay! But I am sure 
you do not mean to hurt me. Pray go on. I am just in the 
mood for confidences. {Aside) I only hope he'll not tell 
me of his love for another woman. I'm so tired of that sort 
of confidence. 

Mr. C. {with dignity^. You must know, Mrs. Rodney, the 
sentiments with which you have inspired me. It would be 
absurd for an old fellow like myself, who has, or who at 
least is supposed to have, outgrown the season of extrava- 
gant sentiment, to clothe the expression of my feeling for 
you in flowery terms, or to sue for your hand with the spon- 
taneous eloquence of youth. Let me then proceed directly 
to the point. Mrs. Evangeline Rodney, allow me to say that 
I am deeply in love with you, and to ask you, to urge you, 
by the sincere affection which I have to offer you, and by a 
faint hope that you may have some little interest in my future 
happiness, to become my wife. 

Mrs. R. {much agitated). Mr. Courtenay, I am at a loss 
how to receive this — this request, high honor as I- must 
and do esteem it. I am so surprised. How could I ima- 
gine you cared for me ? 

Mr. C. {taking her hand). The only reason that I have 
not followed the perfectly straightforward course which was 
suggested by my feelings from the first day, I might almost 
say hour, of our acquaintance, was the fear of ruining 



28 MATCHMAKERS. 

matters by hurrying them. You positively refused to think 
of matrimony until after the settlement of your niece, and 
so — 

Mrs. ^. {laughittg^ and withdrawing her hand). And so 
you settled my niece ! Ah, Mr. Courtenay, what an arch- 
plotter you are ! I thought I was the most designing crea- 
ture in existence, but you — you are worse. {Aside.) And 
my wasted designs ! I had not half begun ! 

Mr. C. But you have not answered my question. I 
must insist upon hurrying matters now. My happiness is 
at stake. Mrs. Rodney — Evangeline — you must at least 
answer me. 

Mrs. R. But it is so hard to answer such a question. 

Mr. C* 1 hoped it would be easy. It cannot be hard for 
you to confer happiness. 

Mrs. R. That is very pretty. But are you sure that I 
am " happiness " ? 

Mr. C. {taki?tg her hand). I am willing to take the risk. 

Mrs. R. Well, then, a wilful man maun have his way 
— and — and we can have a double wedding! {He kisses 
her hand as Henrietta and Aaron enter behind them.) 

Henrietta. So it is really settled ! Allow me to con- 
gratulate you, aunt Evangeline. Mr. Courtenay, I am 
thoroughly satisfied with my new uncle. 

Mr. C. Ah ! Miss Henrietta, you see I shall not give you 
a new aunt, after all. 

Henrietta. A new aunt ! No, why should you ? 

Mrs. R. You see what you young people are responsible 
for, setting )^our elders such bad examples. 

Henrietta and Aaron. Examples ! {All look at each 
other.) 

Mrs. R. You stupid children ! Haven't yon outgrown 
the game of " only pretend " ? 

Mr. C. Come, come, Aaron. It isn't safe to keep this up. 
Miss*Henrietta will take'^'ou at your word. 

Henrietta. I always do take him at his word. Isn't 
he to be trusted ? 

Mrs. R. I should like to shake you both. 

Mr. C. {coaxingly). Now, Miss Henrietta, do be reason- 
able, even if you must be commonplace. 

Henrietta. With pleasure, but how? {To Aaron, 
with a frozen stnile.) Do you know any thing of this ? 



MATCHMAKERS. 29 

Aaron. Of — of what? 

Mr. C. {angrily). He doesn't know any thing, Miss 
White. I don't wonder you are piqued. He would vex a 
saint. 

Henrietta {politely), I have no complaint to make of 
Mr. Fith worth. He has been very polite, and has told me 
a great deal about railroads. 

Mr. C. One thing is as good as another when people are 
in love, eh, Miss Henrietta.? 

Henrietta. So I have heard; and, when one is not in 
love, railroads are invaluable. 

Mrs. R. Mr. Fithworth, I warned you that my niece's 
temperament was peculiar, 

Aaron. Miss White has been very kind. 

Mr. C. {indigfiantly). Too kind, I begin to think. Kind 
enough, I fancied, to promise to marry you. 

Aaron. If Miss White had made me such a promise, I'm 
sure I should have remembered it. 

Henrietta {indignant), I should not have hesitated to 
remind you of it if I had. 

Mrs. R. Henrietta, answer me! Are you not engaged 
to Mr. Fithworth ? 

Henrietta {haughtily). Certainly I am not This 
seems to me a very singular cross-examination. 

Mr. C. {beginning to look a little amused). Aaron, are 
you, or are you not, very much in love with Miss White? 

Aaron. She is very nice, I'm sure, very nice indeed. 

Henrietta {angrily). Things have come to a pretty 
pass when a young man cannot spend a day in the same 
house with one without being asked his intentions — and in 
her presence ! {A perplexed pause) 

Mrs. R. Henrietta, what have you been about.? Is this 
the result of some audacious plan ? 

Henrietta {saucily). I did not know designs were 
catching, aunt Evangeline : perhaps they are. 

Mr. C. {comes down with Mrs. R.). My dear Evangeline, 
I begin to think these utterly unscrupulous young people 
have entrapped us ; but of course these mischievous plots 
cannot make any difference with my — let me say our — 
happiness. 

Mrs. R. Perhaps it would be foolish to allow them to. 

Mr. C. Supremely foolish. 



30 MATCHMAKERS. 

Mrs. R. I may as well tell you. Do you know what I 
was going to do after Henrietta was established.'' 

Mr. C. Attend to certain business — 

Mrs. R. No, no : I was going to make love to you ! 

Mr. C. Were you ? You would have done it better than I. 

Mrs. R. Yes, just to see if I could, you know. {Laugh- 
ing.) You were so fond of your bachelor liberty. Marian 
said it would be useless for me to try. 

Mr. C. Marian Ramsay 1 Ah ! I fear Marian is a double- 
dealer too. I begin to see through her. Well, reverse the 
order. Make love to me now, and establish Henrietta after- 
wards. 

Henrietta {coming doivii). Mr. Fith worth and I have 
been talking the matter over; and we have no objection to 
dancing a quadrille — 2, plain one — at your wedding. 

Mrs. R. You naughty girl ! I shall make your match yet. 

Henrietta {laughing). Oh ! I don't mind. 

Mr. C. And I shall find another wife for you, Aaron, since 
there seems a mistake about this affair. 

Aaron {resignedly). Very well. 

Mrs. R. Do you know — Harrington — I believe Marian 
Ramsay meant us to fall in love with each other all the time. 

Mr. C. I am very glad she thought of it ! They all seem 
to have been better matchmakers than we are, — even these 
young people. 

Mrs. R. {pauses sadly., then says :) No, not at all ! We, at 
least, Harrington, have made our own. 

Curtain. 
Aaron. Henrietta. 

Mrs. Rodney, Mr. Courtenay. 



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PhuI Clifford's Defence Buhoer. 

The Outlaw's Yarn Michael Lynch. 

Labor is Worship . • ^ . > . . Francis S. Osgood. 

The Legend of the White Hand . . . Lucy Wade Herrick. 

Two Dreams H. H. 

People will Laugh 

*' Christianos ad Leones 1 " ..... Francis A. Dnrivage, 

Ballad of the Bell-Tower . . ^ . . Margaret J. Preston, 

A Sermon for the Sisters Irwin Russell. 

Mrs Brown at the Play ..... Arthur Sketchley. 

Dutcu Security 

From One Stand-point . . . • . . . M. F. Butts. 

The Captive Henry Phillips, Jr. 

The Peril of the iiines 

Aunt Phillis's Guest ^ Wm. C. Gannett. 

Annie's Ticket . 

Along the Line Irwin Russell, 

The Divorce Feast . 

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London Zoological Gardens .... 

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Old Grimes A. G. Green. 

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Father William R. Southey. 

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De 'Sperience ob de Ueb'rend Quacko Strong 

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The Girl of the Crisis Walter Smith. 

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A Colored Debating Society . . 

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Lanty Leary . Samuel Lover. 

The Baron's Last Banquet A. G. Green. 

The Last of the Sarpints 

The Dilemma O. W. Holmes. 

A Brick 

An Evangel » 

A Thirsty Boy Burlington Hawkeye, 

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The Song of the North ...... Lizzie Doten. 

No Color Line in Heaven „ „ 

Qincrerbread San Franctsco Argorutut. 

A Night Watch ,,,.,,-„ 

The Loves of Lucinda Mark Melville. 

The Widow of Nain JST. P. Willis. 

The Tomato . Charles F. Adams. 

Lookout Mountain, 1863— Beutelsbach, 1880 Geo. L. Catlin. 

The Little Girl'8 Song Sydney Dobell. ^ 

" Papa says so, too " Jenme T. Hazen Lewis, 

The Poetry of Iron Burlington Hawkeye, 

Hannah x,,. ., -,, 

An Old Man's Dreams Fhza M. Sherman. 

Don Squixet's Ghost Harry Bolingbroke. 

The King's Bell Eben E Rexford. 

The Tramp of Shiloh Joaquin Miller. 

Johnny on Snakes 

Antony to Cleopatra Gen. Wm. H Lytle. 

Cleopatra Dying Thorn. S. Collier. 

Cheek « « . . Phillips Thompson. 

The Right must Win Frederic William Faben. 

Make the Best of Everything .... 

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The Calif Ida T. Thurston. 

The Man wich didn't drink Wetter , 

Mice at Play Neil Forrest. 

Jan Steener's Ride ...*... John W. Chadwick, 

Setting a Hen 

The Marked Grave Lillie E. Barr. 

A Very Naughty Little Girl's Views of Life 

The Dandy Fifth Frank H. Gassaway. 

The Holly Branch ^Wirownie.'^ 

Antoinette Francis A. Dnrivage. 

Claribel's Prayer Lynde Palmer. 

The Marriage of Santa Claua .... 

A Similar Case 

Selling the Farm Beth Day. 

*' He and She " Edwin Arnold. 

The Legend of the Organ-builder . . . Julia. C. R. Dorr. 

The One-Legged Goose 

The Owl Critic James T. Fields. 

Time Robertson. 

The Sleep Mrs. E. B. Brotoning. 

She would be a Mason James C. Laughton. 

The Legend of Saint Barbara .... Mary A. P. Stansbury. 

Reviving de Sinners 

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A Purpose . . . ^ • • • • • 

Building and Being .«••••. From '^^ GeraldineP 

The Round of Life . • • • • • . Chambers'' Journal. 

The Clown's Baby ••••••• Margaret Vandegrift. 

Our Baby ...»••••■ 

Sooner or Later • • * Harriet Prescott Spofforv^ 

Autumn Thoughts ...•••. Bill Aye. 

The Cruise of the Monitor . • • • . George M. Baker, 

No Yearning for the B.^autiful • • • • Max Adeler. 

Ravenswood's Oath . . . • • • , A. Wallace Thaxter. 

The Widow to her Son . . • • • . The Dublin Freeman, 

The Banker and the Cobbler . • • • • Lafontaine. 

Bather Embarrassing 

Saving Mother e • • 

The Sharpshooter's Miss . . . • • • Frank H. Gassawap, 

Bru<lder Johnson on 'Lectdcity . . • . . 

Union of Blue and Gray ...... Paul H. Hayne, 

The Jackdaw of Rheim's ...... Barham. 

Death of the Old Wife 

Squire Houston's Marriage Ceremony • • 

The Baffled Book Agent 

Scene from Mary Stuart Schiller. 

A Christmas Elegy ...••.. 

Conversion of Colonel Quagg George Augustus SatOt 

Tlie Confession Lover. 

A Court Lady • • E. Barrett Browning, 

Tickled all Oafer 

A Penitent . Margaret Eytinge* 

Nebuchadnezzah ...••• • Frioin Eusssl, 

Death of Steerforth • . Dickens. 

The Serenade 

The "Ole Marster's" Christmas . ... Atlanta Constitution, 

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Young Grimes * , m B.P. Shillaber, 

Autumn Leaves. A Comedietta • • • 

Hark! •••. Rose Terry Cooke, 

Intensely Utter . . . • • • • Albany Chronicle, ' 

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The Cham of Gold ...•••• 

Gartield , , , J. G. Blaine. 

No Time like the Old Time . . • • . Anonymous. 

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The Catatact of Lodore Robert Southey. 

A Gliinp:",e o[ Doath From A Tv/ht SqueezBo 

Reflections on tlie Needle Cormac (fLeary. 

TheRedO'Neil Thomas S.Collier. 

Viruinny ! S. N. Cook. 

Convent Rol>bino: Robert Buchanan, 

For Lite and Death 

Ma'j:nificent Poverty Victor Hugo. 

O'thello Harper's Mignzine, 

Washee, Washee Joaquin MiUer. 

Last Upon the Roll Hugh M. McDermott, 

A Second Review of the Grand Army . Bret Harte. 

Going Towards Sundown .....'. Hattie E. Buell. 

" Treadwater Jim" " Old Ne," hi Jacksonville Times 

Yawcob Strauss C F. Ada/ns. 

Leedle Yawcob Strauss — What He Says Arthur Dakiti. 

The Closing Scene ■ T. Buchanan Read. 

Drifted Oi\t to Sea Rose Hartwiek Thorpe, 

The Old Man Goes to Town J. G. Swinnerton. 

Suckers on de Corn 

The Crutch in the Corner ...... John Mcintosh, 

The Bivouac of the Dead 0' Hara. 

" Nearer Home" . Phcebe Cory. 

Tlie Snow Storm R. W. Emerson, 

The Unforgotten Foe Epes Sargent. 

The Charge at Valley Maloy .... 

The Countersign was " Mary " . . . . Margaret Ei/tinge, 

Pat's Bondsman Lilian A. Moulton, 

What Saved t'le Union Gen. Grant. 

Wreck of the White Ship . . . . . , Charles Dickens. 
" Mebbe " Joe's True Feesh Story . . 

Big Ben Bolton Eugene J. Hall. 

The Child's Evening Prayer Mary A. Denison, 

Abraham Lincoln and the Poor Woman 

" Picciola" 

" Fall In" . Mary Clemmer. 

Mysterious Rappings , , B. P. Shillaber. 

Kelly's Ferry . . . . o Benjamitx F, Taylor^ 

Paddy's Metamorphosis Moore. 

Mr Murphy Explains His Son's Conduct 

Variegated Dogs PecKs Sun. 

No Precedent 

The Wonderful Tar-Baby Story . . . Harris 

The Captain's Tale From A Summer in the Azores, 

Speculation . . o . ..... 

A Clear Bargaic . . .... 

Garibaldi and His Companions .... Thomas RusselL 

Pericles to the People Kellogg, 

Roland Gray 

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Lucille's Mistake c . . 

Awkwai-d J. Cheever Goodvnn 

"The Rovs Whomever Got Home" . . George W. Peck. 
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Mike McGatfatv's Doer .' Mark Melville, 

Tlie Three Little Chairs ...... 

ISIakinsi' Love in the Choir, 

How Dennis Took the Pledge .... 

Jud^e Pitman's Watch . . . . . . Max Adeler, 

The JE-thetic Housekeeper 

The Public Grindstone Gen. Riley. 

The Postilion of Nagold . . ... Geo. L. Catlin, 

Pe^''irin(r Away 

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An Ideal of Woman Henry Giles. 

A Bad Mix . . 

Asleep at the Switch • • George Hoey, 

Money Musk B. F. Taylor, 

Pat and the Pig 

Scene from Leah the Forsaken . . • 

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The Discontented Penihilum .... Jane Taylor. 

The New Church Doctrine W. M. Carleton, 

Penn's Monument R. J. Burdett. 

Only a Crippled Soldier J. Russell Fisher. 

The Doctor's Wedding Hezekiah Butterworth 

The Policeman's Story 

The Veterans General Sherman, 

How He Made It 

Signing the Pledge . 

Fire ! Fire ! Meriem. 

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The War with Alcohol W. E. Williams, 

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Good-Rye, Proud World R \V. Emerson. 

The Funnv Small Boy H. C. Dodge, 

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Sacred Relics of the Past 

Auction Extraordinary . 

The Railroad Crossing . 

Goin' to Liza's 

*' Make it Four, Yer Honor" 

The Old Maid's Prayer . 

Sequel to the Old Maid's Prayer 

Peace, Be Still 

A Ram for Quid Oireland 

Choosing a Cow 

" Little Potter's " Story 

Drinking a Tear 

A Sunset Prophecy 

Candor ..... 

Art is Pitiless .... 

The Death of Thomas Becket 

The Old Twine String . 

Little Ellin's Plea . 

How Vera Cruz was won 

Ticket o' Leave 

The " O'Meara Consolidated " 

A Vengeance .... 

The Orphan Boy 

The Statue Scene . 

" Jesus, Lover of my Soul " . 

A Political Outfit . 

The P:ag;8t and the Child 

The Story of the Swords 

A Apele for Are to the Sextant 

A Colored Sermon . 

" Tom's Dead ! " . 

Bob 

The Ruined Man 
Po'pping Corn .... 
Lady Yeard ley's Guest . 
An ''Assorted " Declamation 
The Death of the Dominie 
A Piece of Bunting 
Chicken Talk .... 
Planchette .... 
The Mount of the Holy Cross 
Cold Water .... 
Tipperary .... 

«' Willie" 

Middlerib's Rheumatic Cure . 

The Wisdom of Ali 

A Christmas Ballad 

Mr. CoUins's Croquet-Set 

The Gridiron .... 



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George R. Sims. 
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Shakefipeare. 
Eugene J. Hall. 
R. J. Burdette. 
Good Words. 

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George Stearns. 
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J. G. B., in Ch<(ff. 
William Winter. 
J. M. T/iompson. 
Margaret J. Preston. 
Herman Page. 
Thomas Hood. 
Hon. F. W. Palmer. 

David Hill. 
James G. Clark. 
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^oaracters. Three scenes. Modern costumes. Easily produced. 

2. UNDER A VEIIj. A Comedietta in One Act. By Sir Randall Roberts, 

Bart. Two male, three female characters. Scene, interior. Double room. 
Time in representation, thirty minutes. 

3. CLASS DAY. A Farce in One Act. By Dr. Francis A. Harris. Four 

male, three female characters. Scene, interior. Played at Harvard with 
great success. 

4. BETTER THAN GOLD. A Drama in Four Acts. By George M. 

Baker. Five male, four female characters. One interior ; same for the 
four acts. 

5. MRS. WALTHROP'S BACHEIX)RS. A Comedy in Three Acts. 

Translated and adapted from the German of Benedix. By George M. 
Baker and Willard Small. (" Our Bachelors " and "Mrs. Walthrop's 
Boarders " were translated from the same.) 

6. OUR MUTUAL FRIEND. A Comedy in Four Acts. Dramatised from 

the novel by Charles Dickens. By Harriet R. Shattuck. Four male, 
three female characters. 

7. REBECCA'S TRIUMPH, A Drama in Three Acts. By George M. 

Baker. (For female characters only.) Sixteen characters. Scenes are : 
Act 1, kitchen. Act 2, woods. Act 3, parlor. Written at the request of 
the " D.O.C, Cooking Club," of Chicago, who took "Among the Breakers " 
as a model. ' 

8. APPLES. Comedy in One Act from Blackwood's Magazine. One male, two 

female characters. 

9. BABIE. Comedy in Three Acts. Translated from the French of Emile de 

Najac and Alfred Hennquin, »y F. E. Ohase. Six male, five female 
characters. 

10. A PERSONAL MATTER. Comedy in One Act. By F. E. Chase. Two 

male, and two female characters. 

11. COMRADES. A Drama in Three Acts. By George M. Baker. Four 

male, three female characters. Scene, interior. Costumes raodern. 
Always successful. 
13. SNOW-BOUND. A Musical and Dramatic Entertainment. J'iy George M. 
Baker. For three male and one female characters ; requires some scenery , 
hut can be easily produced. Introduces imongs, recitations, and an original 
Burlesque, •'Alonzo the Brave and the Fair Imogene." Time, two hours. 

13. BON-BONS. A Musical and Dramatic Entertainment. By George M. 

Baker. For four performers : three male, one female. Requires little 
scenery; introduces songs, recitations, and an original Burlesque, "The 
Paint King." Time in representation, two hours. 

14. PAST REDEMPTION. A New Temperance Drama in Four Acts. By 

George M. Baker. Nine male, and four female characters, and super- 
numeraries. Scenery : three interiors, one exterior. 

15. NEVADA ; or, The Lost Mine. Drama, in Three Acts. By George M. 

Baker. Eight male, three female characters. Scenery, exterior and in- 
terior of a Miner's Cabin in Nevada. Time, about two hours. 

16. POISON. A Farce, as acted by the Hasty Pudding Club of Harvard College 

with great success. Four male, three female characters. Time, thirty 
minutes. 

17. THE COOL COLLEGIANS. Comedy in Two Acts, by Miles Medic; 

three male and four female characters. 

GEORGE M. BAKEB, d7 Franklin Street, 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 



f^lky^^ fof ^mJiteni^i 




017 401 294 5 



BY GEORGE M. 

Author of " Amateur Dramas ^^ " The Mimic Stage,*' *TrtwsucTair~,^ 

Room Stage," " Handy Dramas" " 2"Ai? Exhibition Drama" "A Baker's Dozen" etc. 
Titles in this Tyi>e ai'o New Plays. 
Titles in tJiis Type are Temperance Plays. 



DRAMAS. 

In Four Acts. 

Better Than Gold. 7 male, 4 female 
char. c.. 

In Three Acts. 

Our Folks. 6 male, 5 female char. . = 
The Flower of the Family, 5 

male, 3 female char 

Enlisted for the War. 7 male, 3 fe- 
male characters 

My Brother's Keeper. 5 male, 3 fe- 
male char 

The Little Jirown Jug, 5 male, 3 

female char. 

In Two Acts. 
Above the Clouds. 7 male, 3 female 

characters 

One Hundred Years Ago. 7 male, 

4 female char. .- . . 

Among the Breakers. 6 male, 4 female 

char 

ItSREAD ON THE Waters. 5 male, 3 female 

char. . . ^ 

iJowN BY THK Sea. 6 male, 3 female 

char. 

Once on a Time. 4 male, 2 female char. 
The Last Loaf. 5 male, 3 female char. 

In One Act. 
Stand by the Flag. 5 male char . < . 
The Tempter, 3 male, i female char. 

COMEDIES AND FAECES. 

A Mysterious I>isappearance. /, 

male, 3 female char ] 

Paddle 'S'onr Own Canoe. 7 male, 

3 female char , : 

A Drop too Much. 4 male, 2 female 

characters ] 

A Little More Cider. 5 male, 3 fe- 
male char = ] 

A Thorn Among the Roses. 2 male, 6 

female char 1 

Never Say Die. 3 male, 3 female char. 1 
Seeing the Elephant. 6 male, 3 female 

char I 

The Boston Dip. 4 male, 3 female char. 1 
The Duchess of Dublin. 6 male, 4 fe- 
male char I 

Thirty Minutes for Refreshments. 

4 male, 3 female char i 

fFe'rc all Teetotalers, 4 male, 2 fe- 
male char .*. I 

^ Ma^e Characters Only. 

A Close Shave. 6 char i 

A i5*uBLic Benefactor. 6 char i 

A f^EA of T«on?BLiis. 8 chaar, . , , , » i 



COMEDIES, ice, continued. 

Male Characters Ofiiy. 

A Tender Attachment. 7 char. ... 15 

Coals of Fire, f) char, o 15 

Freedom of the Press. 8 char. ... 15 

Shall Our Mothers Vote ? n char. 13 

Gentlemen of the Jury. 12 char- > . 15 

Humors of the Strike. 8 char. . . 15 

My Uncle the Captain. 6 char. . . 15 

New Brooms Sweep Clean. 6 char. . tg 

The Great Elixir. 9 char 15 

The Hypochondriac, s char 15 

The Man with the Demijohn, 4 

char. . . 15 

The Runaways. 4 char. .,,.,. 15 

The Thief of Time. 6 char. . . . 15 

Wanted, A Male Cook. 4 char. * . , 15 

Female Characters Only. 

A Love of a Bonnet. 5 cha/. . ^5 

A Precious Pickle. 6 char 15 

No Cure no Pay. 7 char. 15 

The. Champion of Her Sex. 8 char. . 15 

The Greatest Plague in Life, 8 cha. 15 

The Gkecian Bend. 7 char 15 

The Red Chignon. 6 char. .... 15 

Using the Weed. 7 char. 15 

ALLEQOEIES., 

Arranged /or Music and Tableaux. 

Lightheakt's Pilgrimage. 8 female 
char 15 

The Revolt of the Bees. 9 female 
char 15 

The Sculptor's Triumph, i male> 4 fe- 
male char 15 

The Tournament of Idylcourt. 10 
female char ig 

Thf ^Var of the Roses. 8 female char. le 

MUSICAL AND DRAMATIC. 

An Original Idea, -i male, i female 
char, 15 

Bonbons ; or, the Paint King. 6 male, 

I female char. . 25 

Capuletta ; or, Rpmeo and Juliet 

Restored. 3 male, i female char. . 15 

Santa Claus' Frolics. if; 

Snow-bound ; or, Alonzo the Brave 

AND the Fair Imogene. 3 male, i 

female char. . 25 

The Merry Christmas of the Old 

Woman who lived in a Shoe. . . 15 
The Pedler of Very Nice. 7 male 

char. • 15 

The" Seven Ages. l\ Tableau Entertam- 

ment. Numeieusiitsale and female char, 15 
Too Late for the Train. 2 male char. \\ 
The Visions of Freedom, ii female 



Geo. M. Baker & Co., 47 Fraiklin St.. Boston. 



